Adoption

I've heard a lot of crazy things from people since we were blessed with our two boys. The one yesterday prompted me to compile this list. I figured some of you would get a kick out of these. And yes all of these actually happened - some people's kids :)

1. Their mother must be terrible!
Seriously! You'd dare say that to my face?.... ohhhh you mean their birth mother... seriously - you'd dare say that to my face?... NO she isn't terrible! She's had her problems yes but we all have problems. Remember she's the angel responsible for bringing these two wonderful children to me. She is definitely not a monster, a terrible person or any of the other things I've heard.

2. It must be so hard raising those kids, they are so old you can't mold them the way you want to.
What?!? The woman who said this actually said it right in front of Dae'Shawn, he was disgusted and so was I. Mold them they way I want to - how about embracing them for who they are? They are not dogs or robots their KIDS. Even twins are unique, you can't 'mold' any child the way you want too. GEEZ!

3. Don't you want kids of your own?
I have two kids of my own... we'd like a daughter but we've already got two boys of our own and their GREAT!

4. Is it hard to raise black kids and find ways to teach them about their African culture?
ummmm.... they are from Utah not Africa... how much education are you giving your child about his/her European roots??? This actually happened while we were in Utah - I should have told her we were headed to Hogle Zoo for Safari LOL

5. Those kids come with so much baggage.
This came from a woman of a child who had to be the spawn of Satan. Her daughter was one of THOSE kids who runs through the isles and has the high pitched squeal that causes tumors in your brain. I should have told her that I would take my boys any day over the crap shoot she took combining the genes of her husband and herself.

6. It's got to be tough never knowing if they'll hate you when they get older
What??? One's a teenager and the other is a pre-teen of course they hate us - every kid hates their parents at this age. Once they move out and need money they get over it quick LOL

7.I could never deal with black kids, too many hair issues.
I didn't know you needed a beauty license to be a mother - good thing god gave your daughter those highlights and acrylic nails otherwise what would YOU do?

8.That's why I could never adopt black kids, they are always in trouble
I had a co-worker say this to me when the school called me because Maliek was in trouble. She didn't have any children of her own and obviously had no idea that ALL kids get in trouble now and then. I was so blind to the amount of racism still left in this world until I adopted my angels. People are so narrow minded.

9. What do your boy's think about Obama?
Their 10 and 16, we try to educate them about politics but THEIR 10 AND 16 - ask them about Hannah Montana or Adrian Peterson and they could probably tell you. The fact that they are african-american doesn't mean they suddenly have an opinion about everything black. How does your child feel about Dick Cheney or Rush Limbaugh??

If you know anyone who's adopted please control yourself before you say something similar to any of the statements above. :)

Dae'Shawn's Surgery

Dae'Shawn had surgery on his foot Tuesday. They had to cut out a piece of bone, twist the joint to his big toe and then screw everything together. He was so nervous the day of surgery. He was shaking really bad and they finally gave him some valium which made him quite the comedian. He was VERY relaxed when I saw them wheel him away. The Dr told me that the nurse should be coming to get me in about an hour and a half. Needless to say when the Dr himself finally came out over 2 hours later I was freaking out a bit.

Turns out the surgery went well but Dae wasn't quite awake yet and they wanted me to wait to see him. I wish I would have been thinking straight and asked for pictures of the x-ray. He's got two screws criss crossing where they cut out the bone and will be on crutches for the next 8 weeks. The Dr was impressed with how easily the surgery went and how responsive the joint was after being so stiff for so many months. I was just relieved to hear it was over.

They finally let me back to see my baby and he was still in and out of it. The medicine has given him amnesia, a common side effect, so luckily he doesn't remember everything. He was pretty loopy and out of it. He kept saying strange things and asking weird questions. Residue from one of the EKG leads had left a circle on his chest. When he looked down and saw it he asked my how he got ring worm I told him what it was and a few minutes later he saw the circle again and freaked out asking how in the world he got ring worm. I finally got an alcohol pad and rubbed the circle off before he panicked again. He was quite clumsy but being Dae'Shawn was still convinced he didn't need any help. He kept getting mad at me and the nurse for trying to help even though he clearly couldn't do it on his own.

Once we got him home he continued to try and fight the sleepiness unti his body said "Enough" and he slept for quite a few hours. Once all the numbing and anestheia wore off in the middle of the night though he was miserable. We couldn't keep up with the pain and I ended up sleeping next to him for the second half of the night so I could double up the medicine and keep an eye on him. Yesterday was better and last night wasn't as bad as the first. The pain meds still give him a bit of amnesia but he is getting back to himself and remembering conversations a little better.

I'm so glad that my work let me take the time off to be with him. Not that I would ever wish him to have surgery again, he is really miserable, but it has been nice to take care of him. I missed out on so much with my boys. By the time they came to us they were grown and didn't want their owies kissed or booboos made better. Taking care of Dae'Shawn has given me a chance to feel like I got some of those times missed back.

I am completely exhausted though. I don't sleep well because I'm worried about him and if he is in pain or needs anything, etc, etc. He is always so tired but you can tell he's already sick of not being able to get around and it's only the first 2 days of 8 long weeks ahead of us. Hopefully he is ready to go to school next week and that will help with the boredom. As much as I'd love for him to take his time and rest my baby is going crazy stuck in the house sitting all day long.

Good news is that when he heals he should be even better than before. His toe will have full range of motion again and the Dr says it should improve his football skills. His 8 weeks is up just before spring break and I think he'll be playing football with his buddies 24/7 the entire week.

I'll update everyone more later, for now I'm going to try and take a nap while Dae'Shawn takes hs :).

I miss my best friend

Last night both Kevin and I just couldn't sleep. Around 2:00am we finally gave up trying to sleep and.... okay what happened next is not blog appropriate but afterward we sat on the couch and watched TV. When Kevin left for work at 4:45am I was so bummed and I realized how much I really miss him. Before we had kids we had more time for just us. Now it seems that with as busy as it is -I allow myself to put in way too many hours at work, the boys and day to day life - we just don't have any time for each other anymore. When we do have the time it seems money is WAY to tight that week, we can't find a sitter or something comes up last minute.

Don't get me wrong I wouldn't change my life for one without my kids - they and Kevin are my entire world - but there are day where I miss my best friend.

That is all :)

Time to Catch Up!

You may want to snuggle up with some coffee, hot chocolate, tea or some other comfort drink - this is going to be a long blog. :) I've been so busy that it's been awhile since I posted anything to update anyone on what's been happening in our little corner of the world.

Here it goes:)

Dae'Shawn's football team took first seed in their division. This is VERY impressive for a team who was not even slated to make a playoff game let alone win their division. They worked hard and did make it to the playoffs where they were beat in the second round. Dae'Shawn was feeling some pain in his toe but made me promise not to do anything until the season was over so that he wouldn't have to sit out (more about that later). We're so proud of all the hard work he's put in and how well he is doing in school. The last quarter he pulled a 3.6 GPA he's come so far from where he was a year ago - I know I'm repeating myself but.. we are REALLY so very PROUD of him.

Shortly after football was over Maliek went on Track break and headed to Kevin's parents home in Utah until Christmas. We missed him for his birthday but Grandma got some great pictures of her little man at his Birthday party. I can't believe how big he's getting. He's as tall as me now and wears the same shoes as Kevin already! Time has gone by so fast we can't believe he's already 11 years old. He just started Basketball and I keep forgetting the camera for his practices but he's really trying hard and doing a good job.

Since our weekends weren't all about Dae's games anymore, we miss that :(, we decided that we should take the time we have and head to the cabin for a weekend. Dae'Shawn brought his friend Chris, he'd never seen snow before in his life, and my cousin Josh came with us too. It was so much fun. We made a fire out side and watched the snow boil around the pit, the boys took the four wheelers out and we all hiked into Mammoth Cave in the middle of a blizzard. After we finished the hike Dae'Shawn still wanted to play in the snow so on the way back Josh told him if he ran the entire time up one of the HUGE hills it would forever be called DaeDae's Mountain. Never one to back down Dae'Shawn decided to give it a try. He hiked in the blizzard up the hill/mini mountain and made it to the top pretty quickly. It was so hard to see him and I was nervous but Kevin reassured me that he could still see movement... I still don't understand why boy's think it's so funny to scare the crap out of their mothers. Sadly, Josh is the only one with the pictures and I forgot to get them. The boy's also used the four wheeler and towed eachother up the steeper roads in the subdivision so they could snowboard down the roads. As usual Dae'Shawn's a natural and didn't fall. His buddy Chris did a really good job for never doing anything like that before and stayed up longer than I ever have. The dog's love the snow and Zeus had to have eaten at least 5 gallons. He kept trying to catch the snowballs we'd throw and get all confused when they would fall apart in his mouth. We don't know what it is but everytime he's in the snow he goes nuts, he LOVES it. Brownie, as usual, is just happy to be outside.

Kevin and I celebrated 7 years on December 10th. It feels so weird to say that because it really doesn't feel like it's been that long. We've been so blessed the past two years with the boys and being able to live close to my grandparents that I really couldn't ask for more. Kevin is such a strong man and works so hard to take care of us. He's an amazing Mr. Mom and amazes me everyday with his patience. Seeing him as a father has just made me fall that much more in love with him. I couldn't ask for a better best friend or partner. Dae was grounded on our anniversary so he joined us at dinner. We're hoping to really celebrate for Valentine's I guess :)





This year for Christmas we made the trek to Utah again. I didn't get off until 4:00pm on Christmas Eve and we hit a white out for most of the drive. A 5 1/2 hour drive turned into over 9 hours and we were so exhausted. I was so happy to see my little man though, Maliek had been with grandma and grandpa for almost a month and we just wanted to see him. He of course was content to stay forever if we'd let him LOL. We weren't able to see everyone but still had a great time visiting with those we did. We spent a night with my mom and everyone played Apples to Apples. The next day Kevin and my little brother Jake went snowboarding while the rest of us hung out with my mom and stepdad, Ray. I still don't know my stepdad that well and it was good to get to know him a little more and spend time with him. Maliek was hysterical while we played Apples to Apples, we weren't playing the junior version and the words were sometimes a little big for him. When it was his turn to draw a card he laid it down and said King Henry Vill, the card read King Henry VIII (King Henry the 8th). After we all rolled on the floor for about five minutes we continued on and it's been an ongoing joke since. He did pretty good on the words and finding comparisons even if he didn't completely understand. Christmas Day we opened gifts at Kevin's parents home. We got Dae'Shawn a subscription to Sports Illustrated and he was looking at the magazine while Maliek opened their shared gift. When Maliek realized it was an X-Box 360 he was ecstatic, Dae was still very much distracted by the Sports Illustrated. I had no idea it would be that easy for Dae, we still tease him that next year we'll save the money on a big gift and just renew his subscription for SI LOL.

After Christmas we had Dae's doctor appt for his toe/foot pain. This was actually just on Friday and our worst case scenario was realized. He needs surgery. It won't effect football as long as he there are no complications and he follows doctor's orders. He has a genetic defect that made the bones just before his big toe grow to fast. The left foot is worse than the right and will require surgey, we'll have to wait and see on the left. He won't be able to walk for 8 weeks but the Dr. thinks he'll be even better at sports when he's done. He'll actually have full range of motion and be able to get off the line much quicker. I'll post more about that as the time comes :)

Well that's about it... I hope you've enjoyed the updates! Happy New Year!!